I must have gained 3 pounds this Christmas holiday. My boyfriend is using every opportunity to fatten me up with Christmas as an excuse. He's so sincere about improving my health it's hard to say no. Still, at least the holidays are over soon and I'll lose it again. I hope my employer won't be too harsh on me.
Breakfast
120 calories - a small bun
Lunch
280 calories - 2 small buns and a quarter papaya. I feel quite guilty...
Dinner
550 calories - icky restaurant food that I can't avoid to be polite... will do an emergency purge tonight. Sadly I am capable of it, even though I don't do this much... it really burns my throat.
Total calories today:
950
Monday, December 31, 2007
New blog title banner
I got mine done at www.lclogodesigns.com
because I can't design to save my life.
Gave them a picture of myself and told them to make it obscure and dark.
Hope you all like it. I like this new look.
because I can't design to save my life.
Gave them a picture of myself and told them to make it obscure and dark.
Hope you all like it. I like this new look.
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Calories eaten today
Breakfast
100 calories - a large bowl of oatmeal diluted with water and milk
Lunch
350 calories - calories in dim sum can only be roughly estimated. I only order vegetarian items or ones or regular items but scrap out the meat.
Total calories today:
800
100 calories - a large bowl of oatmeal diluted with water and milk
Lunch
350 calories - calories in dim sum can only be roughly estimated. I only order vegetarian items or ones or regular items but scrap out the meat.
Dinner
350 calories- 4 egg whites, 1/3 serving of pork and cooked vegetables
Total calories today:
800
Are models just naturally thin or starving?
They are both.
I am naturally thinner than most, but I'm still a starving wreck. I blame no one but myself and my choice of occupation.
When I first started modeling, I was 15 years old. I weighed 92 pounds at 4'10" (I'm a petite model).
This is what I was told by the agency after the first round of interviews: "You need to lose at least 10 pounds."
I did. I exercised and starved. I continued to go to school and spent all my time studying or exercising - anything to not eat.
My parents were proud. I was "fashionably thin" and I scored very well in my exams.
I was anorexic and constantly suicidal, but seeing the proud faces of my parents, I could not let them down. I know they love me only because I'm a perfectionist.
I am now 18 years old and still 4'10". I weigh 85 pounds.
"Naturally thin" is not enough nowadays, even for a model. The competition in this field is tough.
I am naturally thinner than most, but I'm still a starving wreck. I blame no one but myself and my choice of occupation.
When I first started modeling, I was 15 years old. I weighed 92 pounds at 4'10" (I'm a petite model).
This is what I was told by the agency after the first round of interviews: "You need to lose at least 10 pounds."
I did. I exercised and starved. I continued to go to school and spent all my time studying or exercising - anything to not eat.
My parents were proud. I was "fashionably thin" and I scored very well in my exams.
I was anorexic and constantly suicidal, but seeing the proud faces of my parents, I could not let them down. I know they love me only because I'm a perfectionist.
I am now 18 years old and still 4'10". I weigh 85 pounds.
"Naturally thin" is not enough nowadays, even for a model. The competition in this field is tough.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Calories eaten today
Breakfast
40 calories - coffee with a bit of milk and Splenda sugar substitute
Lunch
100 calories - a steamed cucumber with soy sauce, a large bowl of vegetable broth
Dinner
300 calories - 2 steamed crab legs and a head of lettuce with 2 bowls of chicken broth
Today's total:
340 calories
40 calories - coffee with a bit of milk and Splenda sugar substitute
Lunch
100 calories - a steamed cucumber with soy sauce, a large bowl of vegetable broth
Dinner
300 calories - 2 steamed crab legs and a head of lettuce with 2 bowls of chicken broth
Today's total:
340 calories
Welcome to my blog
I am Persephone Mader, a UK born fashion model now based in Canada.
I will not reveal my true name to protect myself, my family, and my employer and modeling agency.
Modeling is the life and death of me. I am writing this blog to tell others what life is really like for a fashion model.
I started modeling at age 15. I am now 18 years old.
My BMI is currently 17.8. Whether you feel repulsed by this or encouraged to adapt an anorexic life, I am not here to judge.
I am here to tell all those who wish to read about the life of a model.
I will not reveal my true name to protect myself, my family, and my employer and modeling agency.
Modeling is the life and death of me. I am writing this blog to tell others what life is really like for a fashion model.
I started modeling at age 15. I am now 18 years old.
My BMI is currently 17.8. Whether you feel repulsed by this or encouraged to adapt an anorexic life, I am not here to judge.
I am here to tell all those who wish to read about the life of a model.
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